It’s been one of those weeks where I’ve been surprised to discover that I do indeed have a life outside of infertility, conception, or inability to conceive.  Perhaps it’s sad that this is such a surprise, but infertility has been in the number one spot for “things that upset/worry/concern/occupy thoughts” for so long that I was somewhat convinced it was never going to get supplanted.  I have no doubt that infertility will make it back into the top spot at some point here, but it’s actually kind of novel to have other things going on for a change.

We got to attend a lovely family reunion on Arthur’s side.  We were excited to get away from home for a few days.  The reunion was held at a nice spot with plenty of hiking trails, a pool, and stuff to do.  It was also, blessedly, air-conditioned.  This is the first time this particular group has picked a location to hold the gathering with air conditioning, and while it may seem like a small thing, it’s amazing what a difference it makes in the ability to enjoy the time.  We got the chance to visit with lots of family we don’t see as often as we’d like to, and it was just a great time of relaxation.

I also attended a funeral for a dear friend’s grandmother.  This may sound somewhat odd, but my friend’s grandmother was forever letting us spend the night, feeding us, and making sure that her home was always open to both her actual grandkids but also to their friends.  She was a loving, kind soul.  She also cooked the most wonderful meals, and always encouraged everyone to take seconds (and thirds).  The joke at the funeral lunch was that everyone had to take seconds in memory of Grandma!  This great lady was the epitome of generous hospitality, lived a long and good life, and will be missed by those of us who knew her.

The friend, incidentally, was the one whose pregnancy I have struggled with.  While we’ve slowly been putting the pieces  back together, messaging on Facebook and so forth, it was the first time I’ve seen her since December.  I know that it wasn’t really fair or kind of me to get so upset, to find myself so completely unable to deal with the feelings that evoked, but I am thankful that she has a forgiving heart.  I was glad to see her.  To get to hug her.  To tell her how sorry I am for her loss of this most deeply beloved person in her life.   To talk with her.  And by the end, I knew that somehow, I’ll find a way to go hold her little guy when he is born in a few weeks.  Somehow, we’ll repair, patch things up, and go on.

I’m grateful that even in the midst of the difficulties and grief that there are still signs of healing, of life managing somehow, miraculously, to go on.


6 thoughts on “Busy-ness

  1. What a relief to feel that love for your friend rise up and over all of the other feelings. Is imagine that it’ll probably fluctuate like that -sometimes the love will win and sometimes everything else will win. But at least now you know it’s impermanent. And glad to hear the reunion was successful! Heat = excessively cranky family members in my clan.

    1. It was definitely a relief – and you are so right, it probably will fluctuate at times. Also glad to hear that there are other people who also get cranky with too much heat…:)

  2. I’m sorry about your friend’s grandmother. She sounds like a wonderful lady. The struggles with pregnant friends are so hard. It’s definitely affected some of my closest relationships and I’m trying hard to overcome it. It sounds like your friend is understanding and sensitive to your situation, which makes a huge difference.

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