At my last OB appointment on Nov. 20, I had numerous reasons to feel positive. The baby was bigger and had a beautiful heartbeat. The subchorionic hematoma, about the size of a quarter, appeared fairly stable. I hadn’t had any spotting or bleeding since a very, very tiny amount that Monday. I had also reached the magical 12-week mark. While rationally, I know that miscarriage risk drops throughout the first trimester, there is something about making it to 12 weeks that felt emotionally significant.
My next OB appointment was set for Dec. 2. I was starting to feel better and a little less frightened.
Then on Nov. 27, early Thanksgiving morning, I woke up and felt a gush. I said a prayer, got up, and headed into the bathroom to investigate. It was exactly as I’d feared: more bleeding. The blood kept coming.
I figured it to be related to the SCH, but now was faced with some choices. I could just try to rest throughout the day and monitor. I could try the doctor on call for my OB group, but I knew they wouldn’t be able to see me until Monday at the earliest. Or I could go to the ER again.
I didn’t really want to go to the ER, but I also didn’t want to wait until Monday before I could even hope to see a doctor. I also knew that if I was going to go to the ER, we needed to go right then, before it got busy later in the day.
So we went to the ER, which was thankfully pretty quiet at that hour. The ER staff was able to find a heartbeat on a fetal doppler, which made me feel much, much better pretty quickly. The ultrasound showed a healthy heartbeat in the 160s, a baby that had grown appropriately for gestational age, and that my cervix was still shut. All good.
When the ER doctor came back to give me the radiologist’s report, however, he mentioned the size of the subchorionic hematoma. It had grown to 4cm by 5cm. My heart sank. After bed rest for over a week, then limited to sit-down tasks and no lifting, I had hoped it was receding.
Because of the holiday, I was able to spend the day resting, and have continued to rest. So far, this is the longest bleed I’ve had. It’s still ongoing, and even though intellectually I know that SCHs can bleed quite a bit, it’s still incredibly upsetting.
I am, of course, trying to remain calm. There are moments where it’s almost possible, and others where I just want to hurry myself back to the ER, call the OB on call and generally feel/act entirely terrified. I know at this point, there is, despite the bleeding, still a good chance we will take home a baby. But in the meantime, all I can do is wait and pray and hope…again.