“I can’t imagine making those choices or going through that.”
It’s a statement I hear a lot when people discuss difficult, painful events that happen to friends, to family members, to acquaintances. For so many years, it’s barely registered with me. I know I’ve said it many times myself.
A few weeks ago, it came up in a conversation. Instead of shaking my head somberly in agreement as I have for years, I found myself saying without warning:
Two words. A rushing flashback of images, doctors, that terrible wind-knocked-out sensation of horror and fear. Mazes of choices and discussions and unthinkable decisions. I may never experience the particular dimensions of someone else’s tragedy, but I can certainly imagine in a way I never was capable of before.
And with it, the dawning realization that I’ve changed bone-deep. Someday I’ll heal, but I’ll never be able to un-know.
For more Microblog Mondays posts, head over to Stirrup Queens. Thanks to Mel for originating and hosting.